RESPECT

"Judge Randolph: Lieutenant, do you have anything further for this witness?
[Jessep defiantly gets up to leave the courtroom]
Col. Jessep: Thanks, Danny. I love Washington.
Kaffee: Excuse me. I didn't dismiss you.
Col. Jessep: I beg your pardon?
Kaffee: I'm not finished with my examination. Sit down.
Col. Jessep: Colonel!
Kaffee: What's that?
Col. Jessep: I would appreciate it if he would address me as Colonel or Sir. I believe I've earned it.
Judge Randolph: Defense counsel will address the witness as Colonel or Sir.
Col. Jessep: [to Judge] I don't know what the hell kind of unit you're running here.
Judge Randolph: And the witness will address this court as Judge or Your Honor. I'm quite certain I've earned it. Take your seat, Colonel. "
from the movie A Few Good Men. (1992)

The dialogue above is part of one of the great courtroom scenes in modern cinema.  Col. Jessup, played to a tee by Jack Nicholson, takes great offense that Lt. Kaffee, played by Tom Cruise, does not address him with respect and the proper title and then commits the same offense against the judge.  Col Jessup demands respect.  Judge Randolph has earned respect.

Respect can be earned or it can be demanded.  One type of respect is freely given.  The other is proffered out of fear.  Respect can be given to an elder for what they have accomplished or just because they have lived a number of years.  Respect can be given to people in authority because of the uniform or badge they wear.  A character on TV recently said "If they have a gun I always call them sir."  Respect is given to teachers, clergy, doctors, nurses and firefighters becuase of the service they are capable of giving.  Respect is given to parents because of the life that they helped create.

Or not.

Respect doesn't seem to be valued much these days.  Disrespect seems to rule the day.  Doors are not held open.  "Hello" and "Good bye" are often left unsaid.  The magic words of  "please" and "thank you" have been forgotten.  At a recent liturgy attended by a large number of teens, an elderly man was seen to stand to give a pregnant woman a seat when none of the teen age boys would do so.  Respect and politeness do not seem to valued.

It was recently suggested to me that high schools should have a period of time each day set aside to address issues of etiquette, respect for others, common courtesy and awareness.  I have pastored a parish with a high school for 16 years and have commented that as I stand outside of the school at dismissal, 95% of the students will walk by without so much as a nod of the head, let alone a greeting.  

Maybe it is old fashioned, but we need to instill a sense of respect in people.  We need to acknowledge that other people exist.  That we are not alone.  That other people have value.  John Donne reminded us that "no man is an island."  We stand shoulder to shoulder with others and need to treat each other with respect.  If we begin to respect others a little more, then perhaps our glass darkly will be a little clearer.