Come November 3, please!

Cue scary music

"Make sure that you call Congressman X today and tell him that you do not want anyone messing with your Social Security!  Tell him that you don't want a representative that let murderers free on bond who then went out and abused puppies!  Tell him to stop smuggling aliens across the border from Canada with their pockets full of illegal drugs and smelt!  Tell Congressman X to stop lying about his military service when he won the Silver Star!  Tell him that you don't want Big Government messing in our lives but do not touch our medicare!  Tell Congressman X not to tax your energy drinks, sodas, or bottled water!  Tell him to repeal Obamacare but to keep his hands off your prescription drug coverage.  Tell Congressman X that you want him to oppose restrictions on Wall Street.  Tell him that he is ugly, overweight and dyes his hair.  This message brought to you by Americans for an American America."

Cue more scary music and use black and white.

"Don't let this election be bought by foreign oligarchs!  Stop the Russian mafia from trying to influence the outcome of this senate race!  Ask the Americans for an American America why they wont divulge who supports them and their big business, big agra, big oil, big fat agenda!  Don't be fooled.  Don't be lied to! This message brought to you by Patriots for a Patriotic America."

\
Cue still more scary music, use black and white and a LOUD VOICE

"WAKE UP MICHIGAN!  IF YOU ELECT X AS GOVERNOR THE BLACK HELICOPTERS WILL COME AND TAKE AWAY YOUR 401k, YOUR SWEET CORN, AND YOUR PUPPIES ABUSED BY MURDERERS RELEASED BY CONGRESSMAN X AND SHIP THEM ALL OFF TO CHINA!  DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN!  VOTE FOR Y WHO WILL CUT TAXES, CREATE JOBS, SEND YOU $1,000.00 AND COME AND PAINT YOUR HOUSE NEXT SATURDAY!  (now, softly) This message brought to you by Honest Patriotic Americans from Michigan."

So, please all of you, make sure that you vote on November 2 so that we can stop all these horrible ads that keep interrupting Days of Our Lives!